She Said, He Said

photo courtesy of sscreations at http://freedigitalphotos.net

It’s an irrefutable fact: men are different from women.

We think differently, act differently, and just plain function differently.

Here is a prime example, straight from my marriage.

OK, so, I’ve been losing a ton of weight.  (Down 38 pounds as of now!)  I feel great.  I look great.  I’m rediscovering my cheekbones, and that clothes can be fun again.

As might be expected, the Geek is LOVING this, too!

Here’s where the difference in men and women starts to come in…a man in the Geek’s position might heartily praise his wife for losing so much weight and looking so hot.  He might start hugging her more, being more physical, more complimentary, all the time thinking he’s being a supportive, loving husband.

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! DANGER, HUSBANDS!

Because your wife, while happy she’s getting skinnier, and happy that her husband is responding so well, will ALSO think “Gee, if he’s this excited that I’m skinny, then he was just LYING all those years that I was fat when I asked him if he thought I was beautiful and if he was happy with my body!”

See the problem?  (Men, I know you’re rolling your eyes.  Get over it.)

Now, me?  I’m aware of the fact that I will think such an unfair thought (because face it, ladies, that really is an unfair thought) so I stated it matter-of-factly to the Geek one night.  “I’m happy you’re happy about the weight loss.  I’m just trying to keep in mind that it doesn’t mean you weren’t happy about my looks when I was heavier.”

So, the Geek went and mulled that over for a bit, and I worked at keeping myself from feeling insecure about how he felt about me through two pregnancies and the last 4 years, and a few nights ago he came back with a comment for me.

“You know how you said you were worried I wasn’t happy with you all those years because I’m so happy with your body now?” he said.  “Well, I think most married men would agree with what I finally figured out tonight, and here it is:  sure I’m happy you look this good.  It’s cool to have a hot wife!  But it’s not like I wasn’t happy with your body before.”

Then he went on, and here’s the ‘men are different thing’ popping up.

“To use a car analogy, it’s not like I went from having a safe, comfy 4-door sedan to having a sports car.  I had a sports car all along – it’s just that now, it got a new coat of paint and the upholstery has been redone.  So it’s a little exciting just because of that.”

Now, I ask you, who could possibly feel insecure after hearing THAT little romantic tidbit? (feel free to laugh – I did!)

Seriously, though, it’s just the way men and women think differently.  It would never occur to a man to have that particular concern, and it would never occur to a woman to make that particular analogy.

But, to tell the truth?  It was exactly what I needed to hear.

Have any of your marriages resulted in a hilarious “she said, he said” moment?

Tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to She Said, He Said

  1. Joy R. says:

    I think that was a really really smart analogy! He really found a good way to convey what he meant without insulting you or making you feel less-than. Good job, Mr. Geek!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *